Visit to Kerala - 2012

I am proud to belong to the lovely state called Kerala, but far less pleased about the fact that in spite of being a Malayali I am yet to explore this so called Gods Own Country. Hailing from the state but living away, inevitably means that the annual holidays are spent skipping from one loved ones home to another, grandparents are eagerly waiting to see you and a precious day spent away from them would be considered at best hurtful and at worst downright treacherous. Getting married hardly helps - the count of near and dear just doubles and that many more hop skip n jump stops now need to be made.

Beaches, backwaters and boat rides may make quintessential Kerala, but for us it is all viewed from the a/c confines of cars or trains as we make our way across the state from one beloved’s home to another. Admittedly the view is a treat to sore eyes especially ones who have just left the arid heat of Hyderabad but to someone like me who finds it hard to keep her eyes open when in moving transport (if I am not driving) the lush greenery just lulls me further into a soothing slumber.

The highlight of the visit this year was a dear friend’s wedding which meant meeting with lots of college friends and showing off my babe in arms to the glee of all my chums whom I have known for more than a decade now and with whom I spent those carefree days day dreaming about the real world and life after college. Little realising that those days which we were in such a hurry to be rid of would be among our most precious memories – to be regurgitated and embellished and remembered always with much fondness and nostalgia.

For little Ria, my daughter, it was delight untold to be reunited with her grandpa and great grandparents and perhaps a lesson in life of the impermanence of it all when we had to say our goodbyes in just a few days. Used to her daily routine with little alteration, I wonder what must have run through her tiny head as day after day she was carted to one strange place (for her) after another in forms of transport that she was travelling in for the first time including an auto and a train. She seemed resigned to this new way of life and decided to make the most of it - being woken up at odd hours, put to bed in unfamiliar cots and being made to bathe in different bathrooms every day. And of course there were a barrage of unfamiliar faces wherever she went; wanting to carry her and kiss her, talk to her and play with her, some of this she took in her stride and with others she let her displeasure known with a shrill cry of protest which sent them all scurrying off like wounded tigers.

After the first week of vacation spent in wedding festivities it was time to visit the ancestral home of hubby dear. More than 300 years old, this historians delight, in true Nair matriarchal tradition is lived in and maintained by the three grand old (well young at heart certainly) matriarch’s of the family. With its traditional architecture which allows for an open courtyard in the house where the rain falls freely in the monsoons, high ceilings and endless rooms it’s among the few remaining ancestral homes in the state. Most of which have fallen victim to modernization where the descendants opt for sterile comfort over the rather overwhelming task of maintaining something so magnificent and yet in so many ways problematic. The upkeep of this ancestral beauty is indeed an odd mixture of pleasure and pain. On one side is the pride of being custodians of a history greatly cherished by the entire family and of a million memories which breathe out of every brick and stone in the house. On the other is the pain which inevitably comes with the repairs and maintenance of such a sprawling place with little help. With most of those who knew the secrets to the ancient plumbing and construction no more now and the new age experts clueless about how to fix problems as they crop up. The house also struck me as a tweens delight where I could easily imagine a 12 year old me losing myself in the mysteries of the many rooms and burying my head in books as I stared out at the greenery surrounding the house. You can climb trees and play with bugs, run up and down the narrow stairways and peek into the well, it’s the perfect summer vacation spot where cousins from all across converge to have a rollicking time sharing secrets and playing all sorts of games that their imagination could possibly think up!

A vacation in Kerala isn’t complete without a trip to its temples and this time we had the pleasure of visiting three!!! First trip was to our family goddess, one that is supposed to be almost a caretaker of the family for generations and where it was the turn of the newest member, my daughter, to go and pay her respects. The next was to the temple which is part of my husband’s home; once again this goddess is extra special as the temple has been in the family for decades now. Ria offered her obeisance and made an offering of a small gold ornament which her Muthashi (great grandmother) had kept ready. The final visit was certainly a unique one for us all; this was to the temple called “Muthappan”, a journey of an hour and a half away from home. Being used to the more traditional temples where the offering and the prasadam are the more innocuous payasams or coconuts it was curious for us to see that it was toddy and fish fry which were the stable of this common man’s God. Muthappan as he is called was established as a form of rebellion by the Harijan community who in yesteryears were not allowed access to the temples dominated by the upper castes. While the deities here are the all-powerful Shiva and Vishnu they actually take human form through their oracles. It is indeed a sight to behold as the two human manifestations of the great gods bedecked in intimidating red attire complete with a huge head dress dance to the drum beats and chants of the temple drummers. Then it’s time for the huge throng of faithful to flock to the human god and ask for his blessings. Blessings are showered on one and all in addition you may ask “Muthappan” the oracle to tell you what the future holds for you. The temple itself is set in a scenic location on the banks of the backwaters crowned with coconut palms. We too lined up for his blessing, my husband gave him our offering of alcohol and was asked to always remember Muthappan and to keep coming again and again!

All good things must come to an end and so did our vacation. All too soon, those precious few days which we and our family had dreamt about and planned for months now, flew past in the twinkle of an eye. It was time to say goodbye to the grandparents and great grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins and all! A new life was waiting for us back home; a new job for me, a new play school for Ria and an assignment abroad for my husband. Farewell it was to Kerala till we met again for yet another family getogether; maybe it would be a special birthday or a wedding in the family but whatever the occasion it would certainly be time yet again to meet all those special people and soak in the love and affection of family, the sightseeing we may need to postpone for later J